Billy's Film Reviews.

A series of film reviews and opinion pieces from a film student and all round movie lover! Happy reading!

I, Frankenstein – 2014

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Wow….just, wow.

There are films that are dissatisfying due to being overhyped and talked up far too much, there are films that are dissatisfying due to silly being poor in many crucial areas, then, there is “I,Frankenstein”; an abysmal calamity of narrative, effects and acting, formally known as, the terrible trifecta.

Starring the highly talented Aaron Eckhart (“Thank You For Smoking”, “The Dark Knight”)“I,Frankenstein”had the potential to be a surprise package, demonstrating a unique and exciting spin on the age-old tale.
It was clear from within the first 90 seconds that this was not going to be case, rather contrary as a matter of fact.
Focusing on the journey of Dr. Frankenstein’s monster (Eckhart), the film takes place 200 years after the monster is nearly killed – I think…

Now finding himself amongst a world of gargoyles and demons, the monster (now known as Adam) is constantly being hunted and held captive by these creatures.
Adam is informed of how human-like he is and how he is central to the events occurring around him.
There is a plot involving Bill Nighy and Miranda Otto, yet it is so hard to understand, theres no point in even attempting to decipher it.

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The most disappointing factor about “I,Frankenstein”is that the cast is quite well known, particularly amongst Australians. From Miranda Otto (“Lord of The Rings”) to Jai Courtney (“A Good Day to Die Hard”), the cast is fairly respectable.
There are some inclusions of former “Neighbours” stars such as Caitlin Stasey and Mahesh Jadu, but just like the melodrama itself, their contribution is questionable at most.
For such a well known cast, surely some half-decent performances could be exhibited; sadly not.
The acting is so deadpan and dull, it really isn’t the actors’ fault. What it all tends to boil down to is the painfully average screenplay. Some of the lines are so cringeworthy, it really leaves you (ironically) lost for words…

In what appears to be a high school film gone wrong, the effects are so spectacularly bad, it is extremely distracting and disconnecting to the story (not that there is ever a point in which you are interested, but thats not the point).
The computer generated landscapes are so reminiscent of the standards set by “The Legend of Hercules”, it was so incredibly tempting to switch the film off and erase it permanently from my life, but sadly and regretfully, I saw this until the long awaited conclusion.
The makeup is unbelievably subpar when referring to the demons. It is quite literally a throwback to the B-grade horror films of the late 70’s and 80’s.

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Now, the plot. This is one of the pathetically crafted narratives to hit the big screens in recent memory. With such a dimwitted story that relies on blatant stupidity to carry it along, it’s perplexing to think that someone gave it the green light.
Sudden name changes for Eckhart’s monster just add to the nonsense and laziness of the script. He goes from being known as Frankenstein’s monster, to Adam and then to Frankenstein.
One cannot help but simply shake their head at such a train wreck of a screenplay.

“I,Frankenstein” is not scary, not exciting, not engaging or interesting in any way. It has disgustingly poor visuals that scream tackiness and the performances are unbelievably underwhelming overall.
Aaron Eckhart gives it a go, does Bill Nighy, but it is obvious that they understand just how poor of a production they have signed on for. I guess the lighting and camerawork isn’t horrendous either, but that is me being incredibly and unfairly generous.
“I,Frankenstein” cost $65,000,000 to make. Just to put my hatred for this film in perspective – “The Godfather” cost $6,000,000…. less than a tenth of this monstrosity!

I’m done, I’m finished, thank goodness it’s over. Expect to see this in the top 3 worst films of 2014!

0.5/5

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3 comments on “I, Frankenstein – 2014

  1. Sokratis Lakrindis
    July 25, 2014

    Havent seen the movie yet, but your review makes me want to see it more. Nothing better than having low expectations, even if they are warranted. But 65 million cost is pretty much like 6 million then, reletavely cheap, and with very little promotion, its loss wouldnt be that bad. Its for the best its forgotten to avoid destroying Aaron’s career

    • wmsteele
      July 25, 2014

      I understand the comparison is off slightly, just making a point haha
      I would be very surprised if you gave this anything higher than my score haha!

  2. wmsteele
    July 25, 2014

    Actually no, $65million is not cheap at all! It is in comparison to say “Gravity” that was 100, but look at the difference there!
    “300” cost the exact same amount of money to make as “I, Frankenstein” and the effects were quite frankly stunning when compared to this…

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